Glad I had a brain tumor - Part II

When the doctor stood by my bedside and told me I had a brain tumor.  I was shocked, stunned, and done.  I wanted to leave the hospital so I could call my family and friends and tell them that I was going to die of a brain tumor.  Those were my thoughts in the hospital.  I returned to my home, my apartment, my sanctuary.  My first call was to my mother, my rock.  We talked, and talked, and talked and talked and finally she asked, "so what are you going to do?".   I replied, " I will have to place the Credit Corner on the back burner and get a job, with good insurance, then she closed the call with, "Remember Mommie loves you", and I said, "I love you too Momma"

On my couch I breathed and drank water and I thought about everything that had happened up to that point in my life and it ALL made sense now.  The reason I had no children and the reason I had not married.  I had failed at my only two goals in life.  Now it made sense and I was relieved.  I wrote my obituary for the newspaper,  and the obituary for my services in Houston and Greensboro.  Wrote letters to people who positively impacted my life, addressed the envelopes placed them in a decorative shoe box and left instructions for my Mom. 

I have always been accused of thinking too much.  And I do.  I will think and think and think until I am unable to sleep.  My record for being awake. thinking, reading and researching is 72 hours.  Not a record that I am proud of at all.  In this case it worked out for my benefit.  

The type of brain tumor I had was a meningioma.  A meningioma is a tumor that arises from the meninges — the membranes that surround your brain and spinal cord.  Most meningioma's are noncancerous also known as benign. 

Within the 72 hours I researched/signed up and contacted via email:

• Top 3 brain tumor hospitals in the US 1) Mass General Hospital in Boston  2) MD Anderson in Houston and 3) Duke University in Durham NC
• Type of brain tumor survival rates thanks to the NIH (National Institute of Health)
• If you have to have a brain tumor - a meningioma is the best one to have because it is slow growing and non-cancerous
• Support groups for people with brain tumors
• Signed up for the 2 day MD Anderson Symposium on Brain Tumors
• Set up 2nd and 3rd opinions online - and arranged for my MRI film to be sent and reviewed by the doctors at the hospitals mentioned above

BRAIN TUMOR TIME LINE

• In January 2005 I was diagnosed with a brain tumor
• In April 2005 I began working a job with great benefits in Houston TX
• In April of 2005 my birthday came and went.  It was nice celebration.  There were no family members present.  There were excuses, none that I remember.  There were church members present.  There were friends present.
• An MRI in June 2005 showed there was no growth in the tumor
• In October 2005 I went on a blind date with a guy named Rodman - he was nice but he lived in Dallas
• In January 2006 another MRI showed no growth in the tumor
• In April 2006 I moved to Dallas and choose to work at a company that had an excellent insurance packet.  I have had Managers, Directors and Vice Presidents ask me "Why are you working here" - I would respond with a smile. The reason because I had to have a brain tumor removed.  Point, Blank and the Period!
• In January 2007 - the brain tumor was successfully removed

And today is a new day.  I smile and am perplexed when people say I am strong.  I don't see it.  Many of you have endured much greater pain than me.  A loss of a an uncle that was like a father, the loss of a parent to a disease that allowed them to live and yet cannot remember you.  I have friends who were widows and widowers in their 20's and 30's with children.  Friends who have had to bury their children. They are strong because they continue to show me how to love, how to forgive and how to move foreword.

When I look back on my life, it has been an extraordinary life.  I have worked on winning political campaigns, traveled to many countries, and met fascinating people who are now friends. I arrived at Prairie View A&M University with a dream and suitcase and left with friends who are now family.  I became a member of a church that took me under their wing and made certain my every spiritual need was met.  They gave me wings of faith to endure the removal of the brain tumor, and the deaths of two parents.  So when I wail about the deaths of my parents so close together, or the fact that I am not a mother or president of the PTA, it is because I have FAITH.

It is because I know God for myself and I know God can, and I know God will according to his plans.  It saddens me that God's plan does not include my hopes and dreams.  But with much prayer my hopes and dreams will change, and then and only then will God will answer my prayers.  Always, remember today is a new day.